For the past week, I've been STRESSED out! I'm not talking a little bit.....I'm talking about not being able to sleep because of different scenarios running through my head, having panic attacks again ( haven't had one for the past 2 years), and being an emotional wreck!
Our daycare provider has been diagnosed with breast cancer. She is super positive and I'm 100% certain she'll fight her way through this. She's had many appointments and will be on chemo every other week once a day for the next four months. What that boils down to is that Kaitlyn gets to spend a lot of time at work with me. I've been reminded that this situation doesn't work that well. I don't get a whole lot done, which leads to me bringing work home and working into the night and/or putting the 'important' things off until the next day when Kaitlyn isn't with me.
Also I learned that Kaitlyn will not have daycare after June 10th. Two of the moms with older kids from daycare are expecting and Cathy honors the family that was there first. This wouldn't be a problem if Ord had enough daycare providers. There have been two closings in the past year and everyone is full. Some families have even had to hire nannies so that they can work.
This brings me to my dilemma. Should I open a daycare?? The thought has crossed my mind before all of this, even before we had Kaitlyn. I haven't ever acted on this thought because we haven't had the money to sink into a new business. At the moment though, I can't see that we have any other options. We're not financially stable enough to lose my income at the moment. I could bring Kaitlyn to work with me at the church, but there are a couple problems there. The first is that I'd have to work late at night to get stuff done or come in on Saturdays. That wouldn't really be a big problem. The big problem is that Pastor Jeff is planning on not coming back next year. He is ready to move to a different church. This is a problem because the next pastor may not want/need me to work so many hours. When I was hired on at the church, the job was 15-20 hours a week........not enough. The other possibility is that the next pastor may not be as accepting of my child. He/She may not think it is appropriate to bring Kaitlyn with me.
Then the question of our 2nd child pops up. We'd really like to add to our family soon. Our plan is to have our 2nd next summer. I can't handle two kids at work and get something done, and we can't find daycare for one kid.....how would we find it for two.?
This all leads me to believe that now is the right time to jump head first into a daycare. I'm having doubts and reservations though! I love my job and my schedule. I work 4 days a week from 9-5. On Friday, I clean and get caught up on laundry so that we're able to enjoy our weekends. That would be a thing of the past. Daycare would be open from 7:30 am to 5:30 pm. We'd have to make trips to the 'big city' for groceries and daycare supplies on Saturdays. It would changing our entire family dynamic. I feel like we wouldn't have any time to have fun!
Also, I'd have to be at daycare all the time.....no sick days, no doctor's appointments during the week, nothing. Mitch would have to take off work if Kaitlyn was sick or had an appointment. This is a major concern because he hasn't done any of that....I take care of everything. He doesn't think it will be a problem, but I'm worried that instead of adding more things to our plate (mine and his collectively), I'll just be adding more things to my plate. I guess the part that really worries me is that Mitch won't step up to the challenges and changes.
The last worry is money. We're doing fine money wise, but we really don't have extra to put into a new business without digging in our savings. We could do it, but it makes me nervous to do so....
On the plus side, I'd get to be with my kid(s) all day, make more money, and be my own boss.
Sorry for ranting......Any advice?????
