Surprise Party!

Yesterday my siblings and I threw my parents a surprise 25th Anniversary Party!  We had such a great turnout and were so pleased with the party.  We had great food, great friends, and were celebrating a great love! 

I only had one problem yesterday (I have this problem any time we have an event to go to).  When my brothers and I started talking about throwing a party, I was pregnant.  I had been online looking at maternity dresses, and only because Mitch told me I had too many clothes already and thought I should wait until I started to show, I didn't order any.  It's a good thing I didn't order any, because that would make getting dressed even harder.  Who wants to walk into their closet and see this beautiful maternity dress hanging up to remind them of what they no longer have????  I still think about it all the time, even without a dress or two hanging up to remind me.

It seems that all I can think about is how far I would have been now......25 weeks.....How cute would I have looked yesterday, my big belly and all........It's so hard thinking about it all.  I was super excited to be pregnant. Heck, even the thought of morning sickness excited me when we first found out.  I didn't experience morning sickness, but was still excited at the thought.  Now, instead of being 5 months pregnant we're back to trying to become pregnant.  That in itself is a whole new challenge.

People who have actually had to try, month after month, know what I'm talking about a little bit.  With Taylor, we weren't even expecting to get pregnant for a while.  We were trying, but had heard all of these horror stories about trying for years, so we really didn't figure it would happen the second month!!!  This time is extremely different.  Last time around, our main concern was being able to get pregnant.  We had talked a lot about the possibility of in-vitro, adoption and all the other topics if we weren't able to have children.  Never once did it cross our minds that we could lose/miscarry a child.  This time around, we're both very emotional.

We are:

• Nervous. About miscarrying again and also the possibility of not being able to get pregnant.....
• Cautious.  Again, what happens if we miscarry again....
• Hopeful. We're just really hoping and praying for the best.
• Excited. Who tries to get pregnant without being excited?
• Grateful.  This one is a little hard most days, but we're grateful for what God has blessed us with.  

We're just hoping and praying at this point.  We can't wait to see what our future holds!